I'm a VOTER!

Today I received official confirmation in the mail. I have been accepted as a Voter in the State of Connecticut. I feel very proud about this. As a younger female I really didn't care who, what, where and when. While I grow older and see the world we are weaving for our boys, I am more concerned. I am realizing my voice does count. That it can be heard. So I will now find a healthy and useful way to speak out loud.

Someone asked me this evening whether or not I was upset with them on something because of my rant blogs here and there. I must clarify for those who do not know me well, if I am upset..I will speak my mind to you. My rant blogs are simply for two reasons:

1. To help me better clear my mind and thoughtfully process how to speak to that person without coming across as angry and vindictive;

2. To calm my nerves before I speak as to control my temper.

I have stepped into shit storms before in my life, and I hate with all my heart to drop them on people I consider friends. Now, another thing I as well know..Not everyone will listen to me. And I can accept that fact. I spoke my mind, I feel better..I move on. All is simple for myself. If it gets to the point where it consumes me in thought and affects my life..I really move on. I will let you know I am offended, it is bothering me too much..and I leave. And when I am better situated mentally, I will let you know. But to be honest that has only happened a few times in my life and I personally still don't speak to those people. Too much baggage and I like to travel light.

Everyone has their thoughts and their opinions. I can respect that. I can also tell you when it is time to end a certain conversation. All I can say to people is "Educate yourself before you open your mouth". I did my homework, and I continue to do it as well.

Nothing irritates an Army Wife worse than someone who tells us that we are in Iraq for the oil.

Trust me on this.

Night all.

Calgon!!!

Yes, take me away! It's been hectic the last few days. I have really done well with making sure Chase gets on and off the bus safely. Yesterday was bad with the bus driver though. He let Chase off the bus at the top of the hill with his little friend Amanda. I only knew this happened because I happened to turn my head a little and see his vest dart across the street. Which leads me to wonder whether he looked both ways before he ran across the street. Oh well. So this morning I told the bus driver he is NOT to get off anywhere but where he got on at. He kind of shrugged his shoulders at me. Death glare from a Mother ensued.

I did nothing but run chores yesterday, I swear. And then there was the ever loving fight to get homework done. And a fight it was. I actually got so mad at Chase I had to walk away and scream. He really pushes and pushes me. And he kept pushing me. For three and a half hours we fought to get 4 pages done. What did it take to get it finished? I scared him with the threat of a wooden spoon. He knew then I was not kidding around and finished up fast. We hurried to get dinner eaten and off to Karate we went. He did pretty well there, but some serious fidgety issues ensued.

Today, I took Chase to the bus stop and off he went. And off I went. I spoke with Jim for a little bit on the computer, and then cleaned what I missed yesterday. And finished some of the laundry. I also managed to make it down to the consignment shop where I take Squeaky and Chase's clothes when they outgrow them. I had 43.00 on my account..so I stocked up Squeaky with some serious winter stuff. Now I just need to find the standing baby carrier thing. That would come in really handy with traveling on the plane.

I still havent heard from her about tickets. Maybe I should call her tomorrow. Squeaky's 6 month well check has been moved to Friday as well. So I should be able to post then how big he is getting. He's eating cereal once a day and either a fruit or veggie once a day. Its better when I dont mix them. He's not gurfing as much that way.

Ok, I need to take a really hot shower and get some sleep.

Nerves and tantrums.

So I am working really hard on my follow through and making sure Chase knows I am the boss. But I won't lie. I think he "just doesn't get it". I get scared sometimes about yelling at him. What if one of the neighbors hears and thinks I am abusing him? Because honestly I am scared to death to spank him with the way the world is today. It is crazy that when I was growing up, my mother could beat me with a belt if she wanted too. Or Grandma would send me out to pick my own switch off a tree. But now they are passing legislation that you can not even spank your own child. And people wonder why in the world there are issues with children? Because some of these children need a swift kick in the ass and parents that give a crap.

So instead, I used free child labor. I put Chase to work with chores. I showed him exactly how things needed to be done. I made him clean the toilets he has a tendency to pee all over instead of in. He did not like that, I might add. He moved laundry up and down the stairs. He helped vacuum and sweep. He took garbage's out. And come bedtime he was indeed tired.

Right now I am going to scoot so I can edit pictures from the Woodstock Fair Demo for the DMAA. Night all.

Can Mommy get a nap?

Yes, Mommy needs a nap too. So far today I have sat down for a total of 75 minutes. And that was during Chase's Karate class. And I might add I didn't sit the entire time. I had to run out to the car a few times for supplies. I truly hate carrying the HUGE bag of baby stuff around. But this is what I deal with being a Mommy.

So my son's Dr has decided to take him off all his medication. Since Chase is not reacting the way he should be with the medication, and apparently has such a flat affect to him Dr Herklotz believes Chase may have depression. So we go for quite awhile without medication. I am to call Dr Herklotz in a few weeks and share what has happened with him.

If I survive it. I pre-ordered the third book in the Eragon series for Jim. That should be mailed out to me soon. And then I can get it to Jim. Who is eagerly awaiting it.

But for right now, I'm heading upstairs to bed because I have a horrible headache coming on.

San Francisco pictures.

This blog is in progress according to Squeaky's schedule.

This is Pier 39 off of Fisherman's Wharf. The pier is absolutely covered with Seals. Oh, and did I mention they are HUGE?

That is Capital Hill looking from the Wharf. Lots of wondrous parades have started and ended up there!

Fisherman's Grotto. That sign says it all. The food is fantastic! The street performers are out of this world. And the atmosphere is phenomenal!

The man above takes that little strap of leather and turns words into works of art. I had one done for Chase, Sebastian and Chyilene. Now they are framed and hang above each of thier beds.

I was messing with my camera and got this picture of my neice. She is contently watching the man make Sebastian's name.

While the man was making the names, we gave Squeaky some stretch time. I laid out his burp rag and let him lie on the ground and kick to his heart's content!

Another picture of my niece. She was watching him make her name at this time.

The ever so strong big brother playing patty cake with little brother.

My Mother enjoying a little foot time with Squeaky. She was trying her hardest to keep him from eating the flowers above his head. When I walked over there I distracted her long enough he almost reached his goal.

I just thought these were the cutest grave stones. They are in Ripley's Believe it or Not on Fisherman's Wharf.

The picture's above are from behind the mirror at Ripley's. It asks simple things like *Can you roll your tongue?* or, *Can you touch the tip of your tongue to your nose?* Sitting on the back side watching was really a lot of fun!!

The picture below is just a bridge. But the walls roll around you. So while you are walking across the bridge your entire equalibrium gets thrown off. And I had to rush so I wouldn't fall on my butt.

The Rainforest Cafe. This is one of the coolest restaruants anyone could ever go too. I loved taking my Mom and the kids. They had sooo much fun and there was sooo much to look at. And the best part is..We enjoy ourselves and 25% of our meal ticket goes towards the Rainforest itself.

My Mommy caught me being a Mommy. And did you see the desert we got the kids? Yeah...Sugar rush is a light word for it.


Alcatraz. Home of some of the most notorious criminals. We did not get to do the tour this time, but hopefully when Sebastian is a little older we will make the trip again.

The fog rolling into San Francisco. It was sooo cool. This is my very first time seeing this happen.

This was on the other side of the Golden Gate Bridge. It was like a scene from *The Mist*. I was just waiting for some seriously big bugs to appear.

Craziness.

It's been nothing but crazy here. With chores, and school and trying to keep the house clean and organized. I have been on the go. And I'm tired.

I am also tired of listening to people whine and complain. My mother once told me that if you act a certain way..people will treat you that way. So here it goes..

If you feel he may have cheated on you, he probably already has. He is just better at covering his tracks than you are investigating. And why investigate? You will just teach him to be sneakier.

If you are idiotic enough to believe her when she says all the problems are because of you. Well, then you are idiotic enough to deserve whatever she dishes out. How much are you willing to endure for what you think is Love? And seriously? When ever has Love made you feel completely worthless as a human being?

If you are really happy about being single, stop whining to people that you are so lonely! Get off your ass and PROCLAIM you are happy! Don't whine about the Friday nights you spend home alone with your gallon of Haggen Daas Ice cream.

That leads me to another one. If you are unhappy being fat, DON'T WHINE ABOUT IT WHILE YOU EAT A TRIPLE BURGER WITH EXTRA LARGE FRIES AND A DOUBLE MILKSHAKE!

How can I say this politely? WTF! Seriously now! Get your fat, useless ass off the couch and get some freaking exercise!

And one last Whine of my own! For the love of green Pete! Don't borrow money from someone for bills and then turn around and brag about some new toy you bought when you have not even offered to pay someone back! Gag is all I can say. That right there will put a wedge in between people in a heart beat.

OK, now that I have all that off my back..I'm going to bed.

What to do?

Yesterday we went and spent some time at the beach. Long enough for me to get sunburnt. But niether of the boys did. Both look nice and tan today. We set up Chase's tent out in the yard, and curled up about 7:30 pm in it. Watched a movie on the portable DVD player. The Seeker...it was an interesting movie. We were all passed out asleep by 9 pm.

Im frustrated right now to the utmost with Chase. I can not for the life of me get him to listen to me. I know that my follow through is kind of crappy. It sucks because for so many years I was busy trying to coddle Chase. His father was such as ass to him I felt the need to kiss up and try to make things smoother for him. I guess now I am paying the price. I just have no idea what to do now.

Im sure the nieghbors think I beat him to death. I swear all I do is yell at him. I can not get him to look me straight in the eye at all. Ugh.

Ok, Im going to try now to get a little sleep before the alarm goes off.