Interesting.

OK. I posted the above picture so everyone knows what I am speaking about. Yesterday I wrote a very powerful blog regarding my own cause. In the process of writing this blog someone posted a comment that I erased. And it was for several reasons. Apparently this picture that has been on my MySpace now for over 2 years has offended them. And if it has, I am sorry. But it is my page and I have this on there simply for the humor reasons. And to be frank with you, there are a lot worse things posted on my page than this. Which is the reasoning behind my not having a lot of my friends children added on as well.

Now let us get to the point of the word Retard. Yes, it is slang. Yes, it tends to be used predominantly in a nature to be offensive towards Developmentally Disabled people. HOWEVER, in the New American Webster College Dictionary it is stated just like this:

re-tard' (ri-tard) v.1 1, make slow or slower: obstruct. 2, defer: postpone.

And it goes on and lists retardant, retardation and retarded after it. And shall we move on a little?

re-tard'ate (re-tar-dat) n. a mentally retarded person.

Now no where in my little picture is it speaking of a Developmentally Disabled person. It is meant to poke fun at people just like me. Who, on some days really should just stay home. I have my retarded (slow) moments where I don't think before I speak. And frankly, there are a lot more of those people out there than there are Developmentally Disabled people.

And to finish this up, I will say this very clearly. The Developmentally Disabled people in this world are not at all the retarded ones. It is the *normal* people around them that think they are trying to protect the world by stopping this *slang* and banning certain words from society.

Words have more than one meaning. It is just how you utilize them that can be hurtful.

What is your cause?

Lately I have been listening to a radio show in the mornings. It has a character named Kidd Kraddick on it, who is assisted by Kelly Raspberry and Al something or another. A few days ago one of the interns wrote a letter of confusion. They had just spoke with a kid named Darius who had lost his brother when he was about 10 years old. His story has humbled me and I was actually in tears the entire 35 minute drive to the sub base from our house. I'm putting a clip in this blog for all to see because he is a testament to a life that can be overcome. Darius is in a wheel chair people. He has Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy. His brother died. Yet he graduated High School. He has traveled. He is raising awareness of his disease to millions everyday. He is simply amazing. I sit here in tears as I type this thinking of all the wasted time I have just thrown away. And how his time is limited and he is packing so much into it! *Just a note, I am still learning this whole embed process so I can not at this time get the interview video put on my blog.* *Ok...One more note. I am proud to announce I figured it out! YAY ME!!*

This is Darius's personal awareness website: www.dariusgoeswest.org/



The letter that was written by the intern, Stefanie I believe, was so heartwarming. She stated that she was a self absorbed 27 year old. She stated she did not have a lot of money. She made excellent points about there are so many causes out there, which direction do I go? I love animals, but I only have a small apartment and I can't have pets there. So many causes. So little time. You wrote an excellent letter that most people feel deep down inside.

So in connection with her feelings and emotions I wanted to bring up a cause that I am going to start fighting for. And I really pray people jump on this band wagon and run wild with it. Because I can tell you from very personal experience the world is no longer the bright and shiny place it was when I was a child. People are so negative. Rude. Ignorant. They speak before they think. It's one for one, and piss on the rest of you. And it is sad.

I am raising two handsome boys in this world. I have a wonderful 8 year old son who is sensitive and so intelligent. And I am the proud mother of a 10 month old as well. I know that my oldest has jumped on this bandwagon because I have seen him do this with my own eyes. And the pride wells up in my heart. I love seeing that little boy hold the door for people. I love hearing him tell complete strangers Thank You, and Yes Ma'am or Sir. More children need to learn this respect. What they see their parents do is what they learn. You can not tell them one thing and do another. I see it all the time.

What do I call this cause? Chivalry. Manners. Positivity. Pay it forward. Yes, it is much more than a movie people. It should be a way of life just as it was when we were kids. With the respect our Grandparents worked so hard to earn. Stop your busy life and hold the door for someone. SMILE at them. Say hello to a complete stranger. Shake hands when you meet someone new. Treat each other with respect. It all goes both directions. Make someone smile today. And I bet you money that person will in turn make someone else smile.

Stop and think before you act. Too many people with too many excuses. If you are that miserable within your life and skin, TAKE A LOOK AT IT. Because chances are, you are the negative impact in your own life. Don't just take people, GIVE. Smiling at a complete stranger and saying hello does not cost you anything but the lack of wrinkles on your face down the road. Saying Thank You is surely not going to kill you, now is it?

Show compassion. Show love. Show the world that you can be your very own Force of Nature.

Give Impact.

We are going too...

So it is official now. We are heading to FT Leavenworth, Kansas in July. Jim will be heading out there sooner than that. He will PCS there April 23rd, and get our orders deferred until Chase is out of school and headed to his father's house for the summer. I will make the arrangements for the movers to come pack us up. And then Jim will fly out at the very end of June to grab Squeaky and I. And off on a road trip adventure we shall go. I'm hoping maybe we will drive the coast line so we can travel through the states I have not yet been too. Some of those states are Delaware, Maryland, the Virginia's, The Carolina's, Tennessee, Georgia, Mississippi, Louisiana, Arkansas, Oklahoma and Missouri. OK, those are the states I would like to travel through.

So far I have done well with the research. Lots of neat places to go. Only fears so far are ticks and tornado's. But I would rather learn to fly than learn to swim so I should be OK!!

OK, it's time to head off to bed. I'm tired.

Your Kidding, right?

So, as some of you know my ex signed a 90 day agreement stating he would show proof of purchasing airline tickets to pick up our son. Within this agreement it also states that he has a 2 week grace period to show this proof. Guess what? Today is the last day of his two weeks and he barely squeaked in his purchase of tickets. Within 20 minutes time of when he was supposed to purchase it.

But I will tell you all I am very proud of myself for standing up and refusing to help him with anything. He called to find out which airports he needed to fly into. I didn't answer the phone. I told him to do his own research, that he had the address. He asked when I could drop Chase off. I said I won't, he needed to get a rental car. I'm not catering to him anymore. I have done it too much in the past and it is not going to continue. If he expects me to drop Chase off he had better mail off some gas money. Because I won't do it otherwise.

I will also tell you that I have been a complete bitch to him the last few hours as well. I am finally dishing back to him what I have received. Just in bigger, right now doses. And the irony is this. I bet you money he won't say a word to me when Jim comes home from Germany. He won't even look Jim in the face. He's scared to death of Jim, and nice thing is that Jim will be with me from now on when we do these visit exchanges. Because I won't go alone anymore. I won't kiss my ex's ass anymore.

He has thoroughly burnt his bridge with me.

Where?

Did the week go? It's freaking Friday tomorrow already. Just a small update that so far I have seen and heard nothing. So tomorrow I will write the *sorry it sucks to be you* email to the ex and blind copy it to the attorney.

And start making plans for the boys and I to take a small trip somewhere. Anywhere just to get out of the house. We haven't done anything like that since summer. And there are several states here *Vermont, Hew Hampshire and Maine* that I have not been to as of yet.

OK. It's Grey's night so I must go.

Pissing off the ex..

Is so much fun. Especially when I stand up for myself.

So last night he FINALLY called Chase to talk to him. Talked to him for about 5 minutes and then told Chase he wanted to talk to me. So he did. I said hello and he asked if we were splitting tickets again. I said no. The history is that when there was only one child to care for, he would pay for Chase's ticket and I would pay for mine. I would fly out there and spend time with my friends and family while Chase was visiting his father. I would get Chase and we would fly home. It seemed cheaper with the exception that I was doing all the traveling. And it's wearing on me. I've been doing this now for almost 3 years. Out of all the trips to Oregon, his father has flown out 2 times to pick him up. So that would be 2 times out of 9 trips. Time for him to pull his weight.

So I said no. I explained that I am tired of doing all the work for his visitation and that it is time for him to pull his own weight. He said OK and started to argue about saving money. I said OK, if you want me to do all the flying for these trips then you can pay for Chase's round trip plane ticket and half of my round trip ticket. And then I will pay for our luggage. And I will not complain. Nothing. He hung up on me. Very mature thing to do. So now he is mad at me because I am going to force him to pull his own weight. Oh, that and I reminded him he signed a 90 day agreement so he has to show proof by this Saturday he purchased the tickets as well. Not a happy man. I don't think he reads any of the paperwork he signs.

So we shall see. If he fails to show proof by Saturday we will be purchasing a plane ticket to bring Jim home from Germany a week early.

Now, my other gripe. *lol* If you are paid to plow some one's driveway to clear out all the snow..Wouldn't it be smart to not plow the person in? The ding dong plowed our driveway and piled all the snow up in front of my car. So I not only had to dig my way out, but I also had to go back and forth about 5 times to even get the car up that same little hill I slid down so easily. Damn, I hate this weather.

OK, I smell something not so flowery crawling past me so I must go.

Hrrrmmmmppphhh...

Have you ever tried to type without using your thumb and forefinger before? I don't mean chicken pecking like my husband does..but actual 100 wpm typing? It just does not happen in this house. My blisters are now gaping holes, all along the healing process according to Matt. It looks awful, otherwise I would post a picture.

Last night was calm in our household. Chase and I did a little scrap booking together, I finished a picture collage of Sebastian for the house. I do have to go to Michaels today while Chase is in Karate class though. I'm going to see if I can find another mat and a frame. Now I'm wishing I would have saved that 40% off coupon. It's OK. I can just buy something small and get the coupon again..hehehe. I know. Treacherous.

But other than that I really seem to have things back on track and under control. I still have not heard from Chase's father regarding Spring Break so I will be working on that letter this week. OK, I hear a midget yelling at me so I must scoot.