Jim said Suck It Up!

Or better yet, just get thicker skin. I found out recently that a gal I used to babysit as a child is now married into the Army. Oddly enough she is going through the same thing I am, which is dealing with a deployed spouse who is in Iraq as well. She is still learning the lingo and what not...so I was rather amused when she told me that she thought FOB Loyalty was a career choice in the Army. Hehehe, both of our hubbies thought so as well.

Another small happening today. I swear I gave birth to my brain on some days because for the last few weeks I have been struggling to get ink copies of my youngest sons handprints. Im planning to get a new tattoo soon and needed those prints to get it done. I have a copy of my oldest sons footprints which will go on my left shoulder blade, and then my youngest sons handprints for my right shoulder blade. Im getting pretty excited to get this done, as a way to memorialize my beautiful children for the rest of my life. I even have another tattoo I am planning but its a secret...Hehehehe

I was able to talk to my husband today on the computer, and it was really nice to know he is doing ok. I get a little freaked out when I dont hear anything from him for a few days at a time. While I was talking to him today it occured to myself that I had an interesting conversation with a really close friend of mine that I needed to share with Jim ASAP. My friend and I had talked about how he wanted to visit here but did not want to get into the middle of my marriage like he did with my ex spouse. *Oddly enough my ex was totally threatened by this man and even accused me of cheating on him at OUR WEDDING right after we got married* I assured him that nothing will ever come between my husband and I. And Jim agreed completely. But the revelation came after this conversation with the friend when I realized I truly had not been happy with my ex at all. Because quite frankly had I seen my friend while I was married to my ex, I would have cheated. And been happy to do it even.

Admitting this is a huge factor in my life, because I now know and understand that the feelings I thought I had for him really did not exist. But then it also leave a hole in myself wondering why I was with him? Do I dare ever tell my son that the only reason I was with his father was because of him? And how is that going to impact Chase? That little boy will never understand the impact he had on my life, and the ways he caused me to change for the better. And I thank that child everyday when I hug him.

Ok, for right now I need to scoot because I can hear Mini Jim calling me...